My mother is from Cuba and I studied Spanish in High School and Spanish Literature in college. I can write a ten page paper on El Poema de Cid and carry on a fairly basic conversation in Spanish but today was a bit hard. About 5 minutes before clothing I get called to the book information desk as the manager on duty. It appears that the bookseller had a customer who needed a book to help her learn English but she spoke no English at all.
She shyly ask, "Hablas espanol" and I reply "Si you hablo un poco" (Do you speak Spanish, yes I speak a little). She immediately brightens up and launches into a full fledged explanation of the book she is looking for. At first I was able to get the gist of the conversation but as she felt more comfortable with my ability to understand she began speaking faster and using some vocabulary that was above my head so the interaction began more difficult.
Twenty minutes later I think I had exhausted all of my decent (not rude) words and directed this woman to the Boston Language Institute, no for those of you who know me, you know I am awful with directions in English, can you imagine where she will end up after I gave her directions in Spanish!
I think next time a customer asks if I speak Spanish I am going to have to say no because, Yo hablo un poco espanol, no mucho! (I peak a little Spanish, not a lot). But I guess it was good practice.
When Good Nights Go Terribly Wrong
This is a warning right from the top that this is not a happy nor really funny post, it is rather introspective and it is giving me a chance to sort out things in my own brain.
For the past month or so I have been grumpier than normal, work has been hard for me (a new feeling), I haven't been in a relationship for close to 10 months and lately I just feel very alone in Boston. It sounds like a crazy thing to say but with S moving away and the new job demanding more then I expected I feel like I am hanging on by a thread. I have been in what I guess I will call a funk (not quite depression but not happy either). I never want to wake up and get out of bed, but I can never fall asleep either. I am sure it is a number of things that are putting me in this tailspin but I need to gain control of them before I ruin the relationships and friends I still have.
This weekend was supposed to be fun, we were going to get together for S's twenty-tenth birthday in NYC, get together as a group minus P and have some drinks and celebrate. It has been a long time since we have had a chance to get together and this should have been nothing but fun. I will spare you the evil details of the evening but I managed to ruin what was potentially a great night. I inexplicable began getting pissed, I can't identify the reason all I know is that my bitchy meter went from 1 to about 50 over the course of two hours. At about 2 am S was screaming at me in the middle of Union Square and he was right in doing this I was being an uncontrollable bitch and I managed to ruin his Birthday. Not a good thing for a friend to do, especially since on a lot of days I feel like I am going to be lost without him in Boston.
Why am I pushing away those people who support me when I need them? I can't imagine surviving the things that I have gone through in the past 3 years if I didn't have S by my side for all of it. Deep down do I feel like I can deal with him living so far away better if I am mad at him? Rationally this doesn't make sense, things aren't going to change very much, we won't see each other as often, but if we do begin talking again, we will talk at least as much on the phone. Then again, I was in no way being rational last night, and I couldn't stop, I just got bitchier and I wanted to stop and calm down but I was furious. I was furious at nothing and I continued to be furious at nothing all morning.
I can't possibly be this self centered that I am ruining his birthday because he is no longer going to be in Boston. It was like a break, I saw myself doing these things and I couldn't stop and at the same time I felt horrible for doing them. I was disgusted at what I was doing to a friendship that has been building. Over three and a half years S and I have fought three times and all three have been in the last three months (two in the last two weeks).
Now I need to make it up to him, and promise that I will act like a respectable human being, but I wish I knew where all of the anger came from. Am I really that unhappy with my life that I am acting like a 2 year old? How can I control feeling that I can't identify the source to? Seriously, what is wrong with me?
For the past month or so I have been grumpier than normal, work has been hard for me (a new feeling), I haven't been in a relationship for close to 10 months and lately I just feel very alone in Boston. It sounds like a crazy thing to say but with S moving away and the new job demanding more then I expected I feel like I am hanging on by a thread. I have been in what I guess I will call a funk (not quite depression but not happy either). I never want to wake up and get out of bed, but I can never fall asleep either. I am sure it is a number of things that are putting me in this tailspin but I need to gain control of them before I ruin the relationships and friends I still have.
This weekend was supposed to be fun, we were going to get together for S's twenty-tenth birthday in NYC, get together as a group minus P and have some drinks and celebrate. It has been a long time since we have had a chance to get together and this should have been nothing but fun. I will spare you the evil details of the evening but I managed to ruin what was potentially a great night. I inexplicable began getting pissed, I can't identify the reason all I know is that my bitchy meter went from 1 to about 50 over the course of two hours. At about 2 am S was screaming at me in the middle of Union Square and he was right in doing this I was being an uncontrollable bitch and I managed to ruin his Birthday. Not a good thing for a friend to do, especially since on a lot of days I feel like I am going to be lost without him in Boston.
Why am I pushing away those people who support me when I need them? I can't imagine surviving the things that I have gone through in the past 3 years if I didn't have S by my side for all of it. Deep down do I feel like I can deal with him living so far away better if I am mad at him? Rationally this doesn't make sense, things aren't going to change very much, we won't see each other as often, but if we do begin talking again, we will talk at least as much on the phone. Then again, I was in no way being rational last night, and I couldn't stop, I just got bitchier and I wanted to stop and calm down but I was furious. I was furious at nothing and I continued to be furious at nothing all morning.
I can't possibly be this self centered that I am ruining his birthday because he is no longer going to be in Boston. It was like a break, I saw myself doing these things and I couldn't stop and at the same time I felt horrible for doing them. I was disgusted at what I was doing to a friendship that has been building. Over three and a half years S and I have fought three times and all three have been in the last three months (two in the last two weeks).
Now I need to make it up to him, and promise that I will act like a respectable human being, but I wish I knew where all of the anger came from. Am I really that unhappy with my life that I am acting like a 2 year old? How can I control feeling that I can't identify the source to? Seriously, what is wrong with me?
Off to NYC
S leaves tonight for NYC. I am very sad. But I am already going down there next weekend for his birthday.
You better come back to Boston after the summer or I am going to be very upset.
You better come back to Boston after the summer or I am going to be very upset.
Get Naked
No, this is not a post about how considering how hot it is I wish it were acceptable to walk around naked. Public nudity scares me, ugly fat people should not be able to be naked ever- let alone in public, and for that matter spandex should be outlawed.
OK, now that I am done with that politically incorrect and degrading rant, this post is about the book Naked by David Sedaris. I just finished re-reading it today on the train and it was just as funny as I remembered. I love his wry sense and his keen observations.
This book doesn't need to be reviewed, his essays are fun and to the point, and unlike Augusten Burroughs he is even "mom friendly." Yes, he is a gay man but I think most moms can handle this and it is not a centerpiece in many of his essays. So seriously, take some time out and read some David Sedaris (or re-read some and remember how much you like it).
I am moving on now to Blink by Malcolm Gladwell author of The Tipping Point. I hear it is very good, we shall see.
OK, now that I am done with that politically incorrect and degrading rant, this post is about the book Naked by David Sedaris. I just finished re-reading it today on the train and it was just as funny as I remembered. I love his wry sense and his keen observations.
This book doesn't need to be reviewed, his essays are fun and to the point, and unlike Augusten Burroughs he is even "mom friendly." Yes, he is a gay man but I think most moms can handle this and it is not a centerpiece in many of his essays. So seriously, take some time out and read some David Sedaris (or re-read some and remember how much you like it).
I am moving on now to Blink by Malcolm Gladwell author of The Tipping Point. I hear it is very good, we shall see.
Buyback Bonanza
Buyback happens a couple times a year when students are in finals. Usually, the spring buy is much larger because students are graduating or going home for the summer and cleaning out their rooms. The main idea behind buyback is that students can sell back books they don't want or think they will need for cash, and the bookstore then can sell them as used if we have orders for them or we can sell them back to our wholesale partner. The price is determined by the demand for the book. If we need it we will pay the student 50% of what they purchased the book for and if the wholesale company needs it they will get 10-30% of the list price of the book. Unfortunately, old editions and damaged books have no value. Can you see where this is going to cause a problem.
I love buyback it is a fun time and in my mind a fantastic service for the students. It is a win-win situation. You buy a book use it for four months and then return it for money at the end of the semester. We sell books at the start of the semester and then can sell them as used the following semester, saving the students money and increasing our margin. I can go on forever about the retail benefits of this program but i will stop here and begin a recap of why students think buyback is bad.
1) Ugh, do I actually have to bring my books all the way to the store to find out how much you will pay me for them? Can you create a spreadsheet and email them to me? Tell me the prices over the phone?
No, we have a couple off site locations where you can sell back your books but you will need to bring your books there I can't give out prices over the phone because the demand for books changes ever time one of you fellow (non-lazy) students brings back a book.
I can't create a spreadsheet specifically for you, nor can email you our entire 900 page list of books we are giving money back for, it a big university, there are a lot of books and a lot of students I can't do this for all of you, it is an impossibility.
Ah yes, and most importantly, I spent a majority of my days lugging books back from our off site locations on carts in sweltering heat, you lazy fat bitch get no sympathy from me. Put those books in a bag and carry them over. Walking is good exercise and believe me, YOU NEED IT!
2) Why are you ONLY paying me this much for this book, I didn't even use it.
Well lets begin with the fact that it is not my fault that you failed your class because you never even took the book out of the shrink wrap. Second, i don't decide the price I am paying you, it is a set price.
You cant haggle with me, I will show you my screen or my list and the price won't change, I am a big business not a sidewalk vendor. If you were buying a hemp necklace from a folding table on the street, then you try to haggle. If you are selling your books back to a large corporation, haggling will get you nowhere.
3) Can i leave these books with you, I don't want them?
No, if I wanted your books I would have given you money for them, I am now not going to be responsible for throwing away or recycling the books that you don't want.
4) Are these the only 30 books you buyback? Why can't you give me a full list?
No we buyback thousands of books dumb ass, some of you even have 30 books in one semester. This is our top 30 list, see in bold print where it says "The bookstore will give you CASH for these titles and THOUSANDS MORE!"
Another part of buyback i that we have competition in brick and mortar and online, so we have to aggressively market buyback on campus. We put up fliers on all the public bulletin boards (which have way too many rules). We email students, and we get the final exam schedule and pinpoint fliers to the big books and exams and flier outside of these exams. This is actually very easy except when the students get pissed. Things were going smoothly until I went to a business exam where students were receiving $84.25 back for their book. I was handing out fliers and telling them the amount when a woman grabs a flier crumbles in after she reads it and yells, get off of my campus, you shouldn't even be here!
Apparently, she bought the entire campus and as an entity contracted by the school to provide a service to students she felt I was not allowed here. And this powerful woman who bought an entire college campus apparently failed her business exam!!!
Buyback and finals sure brings out the best in people!!
I love buyback it is a fun time and in my mind a fantastic service for the students. It is a win-win situation. You buy a book use it for four months and then return it for money at the end of the semester. We sell books at the start of the semester and then can sell them as used the following semester, saving the students money and increasing our margin. I can go on forever about the retail benefits of this program but i will stop here and begin a recap of why students think buyback is bad.
1) Ugh, do I actually have to bring my books all the way to the store to find out how much you will pay me for them? Can you create a spreadsheet and email them to me? Tell me the prices over the phone?
No, we have a couple off site locations where you can sell back your books but you will need to bring your books there I can't give out prices over the phone because the demand for books changes ever time one of you fellow (non-lazy) students brings back a book.
I can't create a spreadsheet specifically for you, nor can email you our entire 900 page list of books we are giving money back for, it a big university, there are a lot of books and a lot of students I can't do this for all of you, it is an impossibility.
Ah yes, and most importantly, I spent a majority of my days lugging books back from our off site locations on carts in sweltering heat, you lazy fat bitch get no sympathy from me. Put those books in a bag and carry them over. Walking is good exercise and believe me, YOU NEED IT!
2) Why are you ONLY paying me this much for this book, I didn't even use it.
Well lets begin with the fact that it is not my fault that you failed your class because you never even took the book out of the shrink wrap. Second, i don't decide the price I am paying you, it is a set price.
You cant haggle with me, I will show you my screen or my list and the price won't change, I am a big business not a sidewalk vendor. If you were buying a hemp necklace from a folding table on the street, then you try to haggle. If you are selling your books back to a large corporation, haggling will get you nowhere.
3) Can i leave these books with you, I don't want them?
No, if I wanted your books I would have given you money for them, I am now not going to be responsible for throwing away or recycling the books that you don't want.
4) Are these the only 30 books you buyback? Why can't you give me a full list?
No we buyback thousands of books dumb ass, some of you even have 30 books in one semester. This is our top 30 list, see in bold print where it says "The bookstore will give you CASH for these titles and THOUSANDS MORE!"
Another part of buyback i that we have competition in brick and mortar and online, so we have to aggressively market buyback on campus. We put up fliers on all the public bulletin boards (which have way too many rules). We email students, and we get the final exam schedule and pinpoint fliers to the big books and exams and flier outside of these exams. This is actually very easy except when the students get pissed. Things were going smoothly until I went to a business exam where students were receiving $84.25 back for their book. I was handing out fliers and telling them the amount when a woman grabs a flier crumbles in after she reads it and yells, get off of my campus, you shouldn't even be here!
Apparently, she bought the entire campus and as an entity contracted by the school to provide a service to students she felt I was not allowed here. And this powerful woman who bought an entire college campus apparently failed her business exam!!!
Buyback and finals sure brings out the best in people!!
Antonella and Sanjaya
Just when I thought I would be free of ever seeing Antonella and Sanjaya ever again as Idol winds down tonight they had to feature them. They even showed Antonella with her obnoxious full of herself friend walking around saying how great they are.
Just as my rage had subsided they have to force these three asses back on us! I am full of rage once again it all came rushing back!
Just as my rage had subsided they have to force these three asses back on us! I am full of rage once again it all came rushing back!
Fall Down Go Boom
A few posts ago I mentioned that I escaped my first rollerblading outing without incident. Since then I have gone rollerblading quite a few more times, usually on weeknights, and I have not had any problems. As a matter of fact I was getting very comfortable on my blades this year.
Today, I drove to my old store and parked my car and strapped on my Rollerblades. I headed for the bridge and down to the river for about an hour skate. I had my sunglasses on and my I-Pod blaring (oh yeah and no pads or helmet on). I was skating along nicely, but it was very busy down by the river because it is so nice out. About 500 yards up the path I see a group of people walking slowly but there appears to be enough room for me to go around them. as i approach I enter into the other lane to pass and see a man running with his dog.
CRAP! I am alongside this group of tourists walking calmly along the river and have a man walking with his dog approaching me on the other side, I try to speed up and jut barely get around the tourists and seem to avoid the running man, but unfortunately I get tangled in the dogs leash. I try to free myself but I loose my balance and head down right side first with left leg tangled with a barking dog. I hit the ground hard and I am like roadkill as the tourist walk around me without asking if I am OK. The man comes running over to claim his dog as I dislodged the leash from his hand as I fell. He asks if I am okay, and besides a few scrapes and probably some bruises I am fine, just a bit embarrassed. I wish I had seen this man before I went out for the pass but I didn't and now I am laying in the dirt on the side of the path bright red and somewhat battered.
The worst part is that I am still a 20 minute skate away from my car, so as embarrassed as I am I have to get back up on my skates and head back to the car. I skate tentatively for a few hundred yards and start to think that this is ridiculous. I hope I don't fall again but I was doing well so even though I fell down and went boom, I will be OK. I returned to my car without incident and took off my skates. But the worst part was still to come, I had to get home and clean out my wounds, as I scrub the gravel out of my knuckles with an alcohol swab and mutter and scream in pain at I decide that maybe I will take the rest of the week off from rollerblading. Or at least some time, because the threat of falling again and needed to clean out my wounds is a little bit unsettling.
Today, I drove to my old store and parked my car and strapped on my Rollerblades. I headed for the bridge and down to the river for about an hour skate. I had my sunglasses on and my I-Pod blaring (oh yeah and no pads or helmet on). I was skating along nicely, but it was very busy down by the river because it is so nice out. About 500 yards up the path I see a group of people walking slowly but there appears to be enough room for me to go around them. as i approach I enter into the other lane to pass and see a man running with his dog.
CRAP! I am alongside this group of tourists walking calmly along the river and have a man walking with his dog approaching me on the other side, I try to speed up and jut barely get around the tourists and seem to avoid the running man, but unfortunately I get tangled in the dogs leash. I try to free myself but I loose my balance and head down right side first with left leg tangled with a barking dog. I hit the ground hard and I am like roadkill as the tourist walk around me without asking if I am OK. The man comes running over to claim his dog as I dislodged the leash from his hand as I fell. He asks if I am okay, and besides a few scrapes and probably some bruises I am fine, just a bit embarrassed. I wish I had seen this man before I went out for the pass but I didn't and now I am laying in the dirt on the side of the path bright red and somewhat battered.
The worst part is that I am still a 20 minute skate away from my car, so as embarrassed as I am I have to get back up on my skates and head back to the car. I skate tentatively for a few hundred yards and start to think that this is ridiculous. I hope I don't fall again but I was doing well so even though I fell down and went boom, I will be OK. I returned to my car without incident and took off my skates. But the worst part was still to come, I had to get home and clean out my wounds, as I scrub the gravel out of my knuckles with an alcohol swab and mutter and scream in pain at I decide that maybe I will take the rest of the week off from rollerblading. Or at least some time, because the threat of falling again and needed to clean out my wounds is a little bit unsettling.
No Seriously I Hate the Train
My train ride home from work was horrifying. I am not sure if it was the T or the fact that Spring ceases to exist in New England but I waited in three very warm stations and rode three trains, two of which had no air conditioning. I waited for 10 minutes in K Square for the first train and got on with about 200 people, it was warm on the train but at this point not unbearable. What was unbearable was the fact that a man was blaring his music from a good ole fashioned 1980's boom box. I can deal with I-pods blasting in peoples ears but seriously keep your music to yourself.
So I witch to the Orange line to get home, and as I wait on a very hot platform and watch two trains go by I am furious because all I want to do is get home and take a nap. I get onto the next train which wreaks of god knows what, and it is close to 100 degrees. I actually get a seat but I begin sweating immediately and need to stand up in the middle of the floor, where I continue to sweat. I am now three stops from home and pretty much soaked through my dress shirt and the conductor comes on and says that this will be the last stop for this train and all passengers will need to get off.
Damn the T, why does this always happen? So I get off three stops before home and debate taking the walk, as a train approaches I decide to take the train I have already paid for and require this system to complete its job.
I just want to know where all of this money I pay every month for my pass goes to? From the time I moved to Boston until now a single fair has gone from 0.85 to 2.00, and the system seems to be worse, except for these cool plastic fare cards, that only work half the time. So, I do seriously hate the train!
So I witch to the Orange line to get home, and as I wait on a very hot platform and watch two trains go by I am furious because all I want to do is get home and take a nap. I get onto the next train which wreaks of god knows what, and it is close to 100 degrees. I actually get a seat but I begin sweating immediately and need to stand up in the middle of the floor, where I continue to sweat. I am now three stops from home and pretty much soaked through my dress shirt and the conductor comes on and says that this will be the last stop for this train and all passengers will need to get off.
Damn the T, why does this always happen? So I get off three stops before home and debate taking the walk, as a train approaches I decide to take the train I have already paid for and require this system to complete its job.
I just want to know where all of this money I pay every month for my pass goes to? From the time I moved to Boston until now a single fair has gone from 0.85 to 2.00, and the system seems to be worse, except for these cool plastic fare cards, that only work half the time. So, I do seriously hate the train!
I Win!
I beat the book, for a long time I was worried that I wasn't going to conquer The Savage Detectives by Roberto Bolano but six weeks (yes six weeks) after I started reading the book I finished. I know you are thinking that after six weeks I would have been able to finish War and Peace, but I really am a slow reader unlike what the people on my jury thought.
It was a hard read but I did enjoy the book. The Savage Detectives is a sprawling novel that is divided into three major sections. The opening and closing sections consist in the diary, written by one of the main characters García Madero, who along with fellow poets Arturo Belano and Ulises Lima set out to find the Mexican poet Cesárea Tinajero, who apparently disappeared in the Sonoran Desert in the 1920s.
The middle of the novel is very dense and it covers numerous characters over several continents and they narrate their experiences and interactions with the main characters over a twenty year period. I am sure that everybody will have a difficult time navigating through these page, however, these stories create a creative and incredibly well written novel.
Now, I am going to read something much easier to tackle I may even re-read some more David Sedaris, I was thinking about Blink by Malcolm Gladwell but I think I need a reading break, and a great laugh.
It was a hard read but I did enjoy the book. The Savage Detectives is a sprawling novel that is divided into three major sections. The opening and closing sections consist in the diary, written by one of the main characters García Madero, who along with fellow poets Arturo Belano and Ulises Lima set out to find the Mexican poet Cesárea Tinajero, who apparently disappeared in the Sonoran Desert in the 1920s.
The middle of the novel is very dense and it covers numerous characters over several continents and they narrate their experiences and interactions with the main characters over a twenty year period. I am sure that everybody will have a difficult time navigating through these page, however, these stories create a creative and incredibly well written novel.
Now, I am going to read something much easier to tackle I may even re-read some more David Sedaris, I was thinking about Blink by Malcolm Gladwell but I think I need a reading break, and a great laugh.
Full Moon??
There must be a full moon today because the customers were absolutely insane! I am serious I had two customers that must have been off of their meds, or were just plain nuts. I mean approaching Bible Lady nuts, yes like eating pages of the bible crazy.
1) A woman comes in and asks to see the GMM, I ask her if I can help her with anything because the GMM is busy with another customer. She says that she wants to buy a class ring and I tell her that any of the associates at customer service can help you complete an order for a class ring and I bring her up there so O can help her with the order. About halfway through completing the order she begins asking for the GMM again. O is understandably confused and since I was trying to fix the phones which inexplicably crapped out for half of the day, I asked her if I could help once again. She really wanted to talk to my GMM so when M finished with her customer I called her over to finish the order with Crazy McCrazypants!
I stand beside M, and help her with the order just in case Ms. Crazypants looses her mind and starts throwing things, I also assign a few tasks to the girls away from the desk to get them out of harms way. As we work on her order, we reach the part where we need to know her ring size. Most people don't know this off of the top of their heads so we have a series of rings on a big ring in all of the typical sizes. We explain that oddly enough your shoe size is a good place to start, but to also keep in mind that in the summer your finger may swell slightly due to the heat. She says she has a size seven foot, but she inexplicably shoves a size 5 ring on her finger. M looks in horror as this woman's finger turns all sorts of unnatural colors as she tries to pry this ring off of her finger. She goes to a size 5.5 and decides that it was too loose even though her finger was turning purple due to limited blood flow.
After changing her mind 8-10 times she decides to go with the size 5. M tries to talk her into a slightly larger size but she doesn't want the ring to fall off. Apparently, not loosing the ring was more important than not loosing the finger!!
2) G calls me out of my office because he has a customer who wants to make a return but it is past the 30 days. He fails to tell me that the customer wants to return electronics that she bought over two and a half years ago. Why me? I have to explain to this woman numerous times that our refund policy is 30 days and not 1000. I understand that she does not need these items and I am very impressed that she still has the receipts. However, only one of the items has not been discontinued. She kept wanting me to give her cash back for all four items and I explained that it was simply not possible.
I decided that the best I could do as a compromise, which was more then any other one of my managers would have been authorized to do was give her a $90.00 store credit for the one item that had not been discontinued. I was very friendly about this and explained that I was bending all of our rules for her on this opened electronic device. She was still furious and demanded to speak with my boss. HAHA, I love when people ask to do this! I explain to her that I am the boss, and she looks at me and tells me that there is no possible way that I am the boss, she has underwear older than me.
Ummm, GROSS! Ma'am, I am the person in charge of the store at this time and I am making an exception to my policy in and giving you close to $100.00 back on a gift card (merchandise credit). She responds with, "I hate you punk ass kids who think you can rip off your elders without even batting an eyelash." Now, I can feel the blood rushing to my face and I am forcing myself to bite my tongue because what I really want to do is actually be a "punk ass kid" and throttle her. But I keep my calm demeanor and explain that I can give her this credit now or if she likes I can give her a phone number she can call to speak with my regional (who will not give her any money back). She mumbles mean things about me under her breath and opts for the money instead of the phone number. I process the return for her and kindly tell her to have a wonderful day and to enjoy the weather.
Deep down, I hope she trips and breaks her hip, but I hope she does this after she is off of my property, because I don't want her to be able to sue me for falling down. Or maybe she will be run over by one of those punk ass kids on Rollerblades, and then they will steal her merchandise credit for 100 bucks.
Oh the joys of working with the public, every once in a while you end up with the nutty ones, and man oh man today did I ever end up with the nutty ones.
1) A woman comes in and asks to see the GMM, I ask her if I can help her with anything because the GMM is busy with another customer. She says that she wants to buy a class ring and I tell her that any of the associates at customer service can help you complete an order for a class ring and I bring her up there so O can help her with the order. About halfway through completing the order she begins asking for the GMM again. O is understandably confused and since I was trying to fix the phones which inexplicably crapped out for half of the day, I asked her if I could help once again. She really wanted to talk to my GMM so when M finished with her customer I called her over to finish the order with Crazy McCrazypants!
I stand beside M, and help her with the order just in case Ms. Crazypants looses her mind and starts throwing things, I also assign a few tasks to the girls away from the desk to get them out of harms way. As we work on her order, we reach the part where we need to know her ring size. Most people don't know this off of the top of their heads so we have a series of rings on a big ring in all of the typical sizes. We explain that oddly enough your shoe size is a good place to start, but to also keep in mind that in the summer your finger may swell slightly due to the heat. She says she has a size seven foot, but she inexplicably shoves a size 5 ring on her finger. M looks in horror as this woman's finger turns all sorts of unnatural colors as she tries to pry this ring off of her finger. She goes to a size 5.5 and decides that it was too loose even though her finger was turning purple due to limited blood flow.
After changing her mind 8-10 times she decides to go with the size 5. M tries to talk her into a slightly larger size but she doesn't want the ring to fall off. Apparently, not loosing the ring was more important than not loosing the finger!!
2) G calls me out of my office because he has a customer who wants to make a return but it is past the 30 days. He fails to tell me that the customer wants to return electronics that she bought over two and a half years ago. Why me? I have to explain to this woman numerous times that our refund policy is 30 days and not 1000. I understand that she does not need these items and I am very impressed that she still has the receipts. However, only one of the items has not been discontinued. She kept wanting me to give her cash back for all four items and I explained that it was simply not possible.
I decided that the best I could do as a compromise, which was more then any other one of my managers would have been authorized to do was give her a $90.00 store credit for the one item that had not been discontinued. I was very friendly about this and explained that I was bending all of our rules for her on this opened electronic device. She was still furious and demanded to speak with my boss. HAHA, I love when people ask to do this! I explain to her that I am the boss, and she looks at me and tells me that there is no possible way that I am the boss, she has underwear older than me.
Ummm, GROSS! Ma'am, I am the person in charge of the store at this time and I am making an exception to my policy in and giving you close to $100.00 back on a gift card (merchandise credit). She responds with, "I hate you punk ass kids who think you can rip off your elders without even batting an eyelash." Now, I can feel the blood rushing to my face and I am forcing myself to bite my tongue because what I really want to do is actually be a "punk ass kid" and throttle her. But I keep my calm demeanor and explain that I can give her this credit now or if she likes I can give her a phone number she can call to speak with my regional (who will not give her any money back). She mumbles mean things about me under her breath and opts for the money instead of the phone number. I process the return for her and kindly tell her to have a wonderful day and to enjoy the weather.
Deep down, I hope she trips and breaks her hip, but I hope she does this after she is off of my property, because I don't want her to be able to sue me for falling down. Or maybe she will be run over by one of those punk ass kids on Rollerblades, and then they will steal her merchandise credit for 100 bucks.
Oh the joys of working with the public, every once in a while you end up with the nutty ones, and man oh man today did I ever end up with the nutty ones.
S is Leaving Me
I have known for a while that S is probably going to be moving to NYC for the summer for an internship. I am excited for him, he is doing well in school and working hard to finish up his degree (accounting and finance and stuff). The problem with this is that S may be moving to NYC for the summer.
Over the past three years since I moved back to Boston, S has been here. We talk every day, i see him a few times a week, and Boston will not be the same for me if he isn't here. I know its part of growing up for both of us and growing in our lives. Just seems very odd for us to be in two different cities for more then a couple of days. I am thinking that I am going to have to be making weekend trips to the city.
And then what is going to happen to our Wednesday night tradition, it come from the single simple idea that its really fun to go out and make S serve us drinks, and if S isn't there then it might not be as much fun. S has already told me that I have to go every Wednesday, however, and make sure I remind all of his regulars that he is going to be back in September.
I guess we will see what the future holds, I wish S all the best and more importantly I hope that I can survive without S being in Boston. I am really glad he switched his cell service because we can talk now without worrying.
I still can't believe S is leaving me!
Over the past three years since I moved back to Boston, S has been here. We talk every day, i see him a few times a week, and Boston will not be the same for me if he isn't here. I know its part of growing up for both of us and growing in our lives. Just seems very odd for us to be in two different cities for more then a couple of days. I am thinking that I am going to have to be making weekend trips to the city.
And then what is going to happen to our Wednesday night tradition, it come from the single simple idea that its really fun to go out and make S serve us drinks, and if S isn't there then it might not be as much fun. S has already told me that I have to go every Wednesday, however, and make sure I remind all of his regulars that he is going to be back in September.
I guess we will see what the future holds, I wish S all the best and more importantly I hope that I can survive without S being in Boston. I am really glad he switched his cell service because we can talk now without worrying.
I still can't believe S is leaving me!
My Jeans Have Been Found
For those of you who have been reading this blog since November you might remember my post from November 24, called S wants to be entertained. It was a good post where I revealed to you all how crazy I really was. Since I don't expect you all to go back and read the post here are some of the basics.
In September I had broken up with R, and since we were practically living together I had a lot of stuff at his house. Most of the things I gathered right after we broke up but I was missing a few things like a pair of jeans and a few DVD's and stuff. Back in November, right before Thanksgiving I went over to pick up these things, with plans to wear the jeans I had left out that night. The problem was my ex was asleep and his twin brother let me in to claim my stuff, I couldn't wake him up and I left without my jeans. I was very sad.
Well, on Wednesday night I went out to S's bar, a part of our usual Wednesday night tradition and R was there as well. Things are good and they have been for a while, we talk all the time about everything and we hang out when we are out together. There is no anger and throwing things when we see each other so it is very healthy. The best part is he found my jeans and remembered to bring them out so I could get them at the end of the night. I was really excited. It turns out that the jeans were in his brothers closet and since all three of us wore the same size our clothes got mixed up when we would do laundry. So, it turns out that I wasn't wandering around Boston without my pants on!
I know that it is a little thing, but the little things are very important and I am so happy that I have my jeans back. Now, I just need to build up some energy so I can wear them out soon. Going to have to be next week I think, I had too much fun on Wednesday!
In September I had broken up with R, and since we were practically living together I had a lot of stuff at his house. Most of the things I gathered right after we broke up but I was missing a few things like a pair of jeans and a few DVD's and stuff. Back in November, right before Thanksgiving I went over to pick up these things, with plans to wear the jeans I had left out that night. The problem was my ex was asleep and his twin brother let me in to claim my stuff, I couldn't wake him up and I left without my jeans. I was very sad.
Well, on Wednesday night I went out to S's bar, a part of our usual Wednesday night tradition and R was there as well. Things are good and they have been for a while, we talk all the time about everything and we hang out when we are out together. There is no anger and throwing things when we see each other so it is very healthy. The best part is he found my jeans and remembered to bring them out so I could get them at the end of the night. I was really excited. It turns out that the jeans were in his brothers closet and since all three of us wore the same size our clothes got mixed up when we would do laundry. So, it turns out that I wasn't wandering around Boston without my pants on!
I know that it is a little thing, but the little things are very important and I am so happy that I have my jeans back. Now, I just need to build up some energy so I can wear them out soon. Going to have to be next week I think, I had too much fun on Wednesday!
A Warning
For those of you who ride on the train I am warning you now... if you do not let me get off of the train before you try to push yourself through the doors I will push you out of my way and run you over and step on you if you fall down.
I am so frustrated with people trying to get on the train and not letting other people get off. The train is not going to leave without you just let me get off so I can go home!
Oh, and I am serious!
I am so frustrated with people trying to get on the train and not letting other people get off. The train is not going to leave without you just let me get off so I can go home!
Oh, and I am serious!
What Stinks?
Today we got in a new line of aromatherapy products and I am sure that they smell very nice one on one but the problem is when you pile six concentrated and contrasting scents onto one small round table the smell is overpowering. My eyes were watering for a good portion of the day as the the odor permeated into my office. Customers were even asking what that smell was!
My guess, we are going to be marking these down to 50% off and then a buck after about 30 days. I just hope I can get used to them.
My guess, we are going to be marking these down to 50% off and then a buck after about 30 days. I just hope I can get used to them.
Like A Shrink... But Free
I love my blog, I posted my Super Duper Catch Up Post and I realized that I felt much better. Its like a went to a shrink and talked about all of the things that stress me out and make me crazy and I didn't have to pay a thing.
I think that this blogging thing may be very healthy for all those people who are stressed out like me. It allows me to vent and its free!
I think that this blogging thing may be very healthy for all those people who are stressed out like me. It allows me to vent and its free!
Super Duper Catch Up Post
OK so I am in the midst of another twenty odd days without a day off and I have let my blogging fall behind which makes me quite sad. So I am sitting down now and getting everybody caught up on the things that are going on at work, outside of work, and in my crazy mind. Please note that this post may be even more random then normal and some sections may just be a line long... so here we go...
Caps and Gowns: AKA Fat People in Skinny Clothing
At my new store we do cap and gown rental, and in order for students to walk at graduation they need to prove that the either rented or purchased a gown from my store. Renting a gown is very easy and relatively inexpensive considering what you pay for your education and your textbooks. The only thing I need for you to rent a gown is your height, your cap size and your weight. The weight is where the problem lies... your gown is supposed to be loose fitting but i am very worried that some of these students are going to be walking in skin tight gowns because they are all lying about their weight. I had one girl who was my height and clearly weighed more then I do (145) write down that she was 85lbs. I know that weight is a sensitive subject and I am not going to have you weight embroidered in huge gold letters on the back of your gown so please be honest or you are going to look ridiculous getting your diploma (and then you are going to blame me the bookstore because you are a liar).
American Idol: Sanjaya is Gone Thank Goodness
It took long enough but last week they finally voted off the dork that was ruining the Idol experience for us true idol fans. Sanjaya Malankar is finally gone, I hated him almost as much as I hated Antonella Barba, I was so excited when he was voted off that I almost did a back flip in my living room.
Reading
For the past three weeks I have been reading the same book, I actually really love the book and the writing is excellent, the problem is the story gets a bit hard to follow sometimes and on a couple of occasions I need to stop and reread paragraphs or look up works. I feel like I have hit a reading road block but I am going to keep on pushing and hopefully finish by may. So much for being a fast reader. But I do recommend The Savage Detectives by Bolano to any real reader, especially if you are smarter then me.
Revolving Doors and Escalators
Okay, I can see you now all rolling your eyes and going what could possibly be interesting about revolving doors and escalators, and before I worked in retail I would have said the same thing. But last week I was working on the upper level of my store and observed three people get stuck trying to navigate through the revolving door with suitcases strollers and multiple people in one section of the revolving door. I mean people really its not that hard, one person, with no luggage and no strollers. When you try to stretch the boundaries of a revolving door it will hurt you, or you will get stuck and feel like an idiot, and I will laugh. Now, moving on to escalators, these contraptions are actually just moving stairs, if for some reason these stairs stop moving then you can still use them by walking up and down them, it really not that hard and there is no need to approach a bookseller to ask if there is any way to get downstairs. You can do it all by yourself!
My Inventory Tour
Before I close out this post I want to say that my thoughts and prayers are with the victims and the families affected by the tragedy at Virgina Tech last week. I was shocked and depressed and amazed at what this world is coming to. Time is said to heal all wounds, but I want to know what is going to heal our society as a whole.
That's all for this post, I am sure it is plenty for the few of you who read my post to read, yes you S and K! And K I posted something other then mice and vomit so you can continue reading!
Caps and Gowns: AKA Fat People in Skinny Clothing
At my new store we do cap and gown rental, and in order for students to walk at graduation they need to prove that the either rented or purchased a gown from my store. Renting a gown is very easy and relatively inexpensive considering what you pay for your education and your textbooks. The only thing I need for you to rent a gown is your height, your cap size and your weight. The weight is where the problem lies... your gown is supposed to be loose fitting but i am very worried that some of these students are going to be walking in skin tight gowns because they are all lying about their weight. I had one girl who was my height and clearly weighed more then I do (145) write down that she was 85lbs. I know that weight is a sensitive subject and I am not going to have you weight embroidered in huge gold letters on the back of your gown so please be honest or you are going to look ridiculous getting your diploma (and then you are going to blame me the bookstore because you are a liar).
American Idol: Sanjaya is Gone Thank Goodness
It took long enough but last week they finally voted off the dork that was ruining the Idol experience for us true idol fans. Sanjaya Malankar is finally gone, I hated him almost as much as I hated Antonella Barba, I was so excited when he was voted off that I almost did a back flip in my living room.
Reading
For the past three weeks I have been reading the same book, I actually really love the book and the writing is excellent, the problem is the story gets a bit hard to follow sometimes and on a couple of occasions I need to stop and reread paragraphs or look up works. I feel like I have hit a reading road block but I am going to keep on pushing and hopefully finish by may. So much for being a fast reader. But I do recommend The Savage Detectives by Bolano to any real reader, especially if you are smarter then me.
Revolving Doors and Escalators
Okay, I can see you now all rolling your eyes and going what could possibly be interesting about revolving doors and escalators, and before I worked in retail I would have said the same thing. But last week I was working on the upper level of my store and observed three people get stuck trying to navigate through the revolving door with suitcases strollers and multiple people in one section of the revolving door. I mean people really its not that hard, one person, with no luggage and no strollers. When you try to stretch the boundaries of a revolving door it will hurt you, or you will get stuck and feel like an idiot, and I will laugh. Now, moving on to escalators, these contraptions are actually just moving stairs, if for some reason these stairs stop moving then you can still use them by walking up and down them, it really not that hard and there is no need to approach a bookseller to ask if there is any way to get downstairs. You can do it all by yourself!
My Inventory Tour
I am on tour this week, yes my 2007 inventory tour started and has three Boston area stops. Its started on Sunday and continues today and my final stop is next Sunday at my old store. I am already hearing the beeping from the PDT's that RGIS carries, and seeing strings of numbers in my sleep.
Hot or Cold
The weather really needs to make up its mind, it was freezing early last week and it was 80 and sunny today. I would have preferred some sort of spring but I know that is asking for too much here in Boston. So, lets hope that it at least stays warm.
Rollerblading Incidents and Sunburns
Now that the weather has warmed up I have been walking around the city a lot (due to my hatred for public transportation) and a need to enjoy the few hours I have outdoors. So on Saturday I went on my first rollerblading trip around the Charles this season, I love rollerblading on the Charles and it was so nice that I was able to put on a tank top shorts and my sunglasses and skate for over two hours with my I-pod blaring my music, it was a great workout and it was so much fun. This year my first skate of the season was uneventful but in the past I have almost ended up in the river or one very unlucky I flipped head first over a stroller. The one thing that always happens on my first skate however, is I get a bit of a sunburn, it is usually the first nice day of the year and I always fail to put on suntan lotion, yes I forgot again this year and I have silly tan (errr burn) lines again.
New Phone
I got a new phone two weeks ago, I love it! I had to fight with Verizon to get it but I rarely loose a fight, I know the ins and outs of retail and I take advantage of the fact that the customer is always right!
V-TechBefore I close out this post I want to say that my thoughts and prayers are with the victims and the families affected by the tragedy at Virgina Tech last week. I was shocked and depressed and amazed at what this world is coming to. Time is said to heal all wounds, but I want to know what is going to heal our society as a whole.
That's all for this post, I am sure it is plenty for the few of you who read my post to read, yes you S and K! And K I posted something other then mice and vomit so you can continue reading!
Good Morning, Here is a Mouse
You know that your day is not going to be good when you walk in and the first thing you have to do is dispose of two mice that are stuck on a sticky trap in the lower level break room. When I walked in yesterday morning I immediately heard a high pitched scream from the break room. This is not a noise you want to here at 9:15 am, when you were hoping to get in early just to get a little bit of extra work done. I walk in and see two of my employees standing on a bench in the middle of the break room. Yeah, I have seen this before and I immediately asked where the mouse was. They gestured to the corner and I saw two mice still twitching stuck to a glue trap, I went to the office, grabbed two plastic bags, put one over my hand and grabbed the trap and put it in the other bag. I walked out back and disposed of the animals (don't ask what I did).
You know that your day is going to be rough when within the first 15 minutes you have to dispose of live animals stuck on glue. About 45 minutes later a manager is paged to customer service, I was on the upper level so I walked up to customer service and noticed that the store smelled a bit funny.
O says, "Umm, I think we have a problem," as she points to the entrance of the store.
I look over and notice that there is a puddle of puke that numerous customers have apparently blindly walked through and tracked into the store. I don't deal well with this, at least not as well as I can deal with the mice. So I need to run downstairs and fill the mop bucket and drag up the mop to clean up the mess. I am moping and cleaning with my shirt pulled up over my nose and customers are continuously walking through what I am doing until one finally stops and says...
"Hey, did you know that somebody threw up all over the floor here!"
Yeah, I noticed, that's why I am here with a mop cleaning up the mess. If I hadn't noticed then at this moment you would be walking through a puddle of vomit. Quite honestly if you are this stupid then I kind of wish you had walked in not noticed and slipped and fell ass first into this puddle Captain Obvious.
Man, it was going to be a rough day!
You know that your day is going to be rough when within the first 15 minutes you have to dispose of live animals stuck on glue. About 45 minutes later a manager is paged to customer service, I was on the upper level so I walked up to customer service and noticed that the store smelled a bit funny.
O says, "Umm, I think we have a problem," as she points to the entrance of the store.
I look over and notice that there is a puddle of puke that numerous customers have apparently blindly walked through and tracked into the store. I don't deal well with this, at least not as well as I can deal with the mice. So I need to run downstairs and fill the mop bucket and drag up the mop to clean up the mess. I am moping and cleaning with my shirt pulled up over my nose and customers are continuously walking through what I am doing until one finally stops and says...
"Hey, did you know that somebody threw up all over the floor here!"
Yeah, I noticed, that's why I am here with a mop cleaning up the mess. If I hadn't noticed then at this moment you would be walking through a puddle of vomit. Quite honestly if you are this stupid then I kind of wish you had walked in not noticed and slipped and fell ass first into this puddle Captain Obvious.
Man, it was going to be a rough day!
Mobey on My Pocket
I have been telling people about this all week and since I haven't posted in close to two weeks, I figure what better work story to make a blogging comeback with.
We have an ad online looking for a couple of new full time employees at my store, we always get some interesting applicants when we post ads online, I guess it is to be expected but what I really don't understand is how come people applying for jobs don't have somebody proofread the correspondence. I am an awful speller, I write in run on sentences sometimes. I dangle my participles and use the wrong words every once in a while. However, if I am applying for a job or if working on important business correspondence I make sure that somebody proofreads what I am writing.
On Tuesday I received an email from an applicant whose objective (as listed on her resume) was "To have a job." I guess this is a good objective, and it is the reason why we all go on interviews but not what you really want to write down as the first thing on your resume. After I read through her god awful resume I closed the file and took a quick look at her cover email and discovered the following line...
"I want to have a job to put mobey on my pocket" This one line defined the online hiring process. You never know what you get! All of the applicants want to put mobey on their pockets but they just can't seem to find a job. Seriously, who doesn't look at what they are writing and don't realize how stupid they look? How are they ever going to get a real full time job if they are writing to all of the employers that they want to put mobey on their pockets? I mean I am thinking now that the blogger spell checker is going to go nuts before it allows me to post this since it says mobey everywhere!
This became the in store joke this week, I had to share this resume with the other managers! Hey C, do you want to work an extra hour today... you can put a little extra mobey on your pocket! M, guess what? Today is payday, it will be nice to finally have some mobey on my pocket. G, make sure you put that mobey in the register and don't just put that mobey on your pocket. Are you laughing yet, we were laughing all week at this poor girl who wanted mobey on her pocket.
This isn't the only one we had that was ridiculous this week, one person had some first aid experience and wrote that she had, "training to save live people" and another women whose long run on objective sentence said she wanted to work in an "upcoming and growing work job." So after all of these I have figured out what I am going to do after I leave the retail world, I am going to run classes on how to write resumes and conduct yourself at interviews. After a few more years of this I am pretty sure that I will have seen everything.
But I am not sure how "Mobey on my pocket" will ever be topped.
We have an ad online looking for a couple of new full time employees at my store, we always get some interesting applicants when we post ads online, I guess it is to be expected but what I really don't understand is how come people applying for jobs don't have somebody proofread the correspondence. I am an awful speller, I write in run on sentences sometimes. I dangle my participles and use the wrong words every once in a while. However, if I am applying for a job or if working on important business correspondence I make sure that somebody proofreads what I am writing.
On Tuesday I received an email from an applicant whose objective (as listed on her resume) was "To have a job." I guess this is a good objective, and it is the reason why we all go on interviews but not what you really want to write down as the first thing on your resume. After I read through her god awful resume I closed the file and took a quick look at her cover email and discovered the following line...
"I want to have a job to put mobey on my pocket" This one line defined the online hiring process. You never know what you get! All of the applicants want to put mobey on their pockets but they just can't seem to find a job. Seriously, who doesn't look at what they are writing and don't realize how stupid they look? How are they ever going to get a real full time job if they are writing to all of the employers that they want to put mobey on their pockets? I mean I am thinking now that the blogger spell checker is going to go nuts before it allows me to post this since it says mobey everywhere!
This became the in store joke this week, I had to share this resume with the other managers! Hey C, do you want to work an extra hour today... you can put a little extra mobey on your pocket! M, guess what? Today is payday, it will be nice to finally have some mobey on my pocket. G, make sure you put that mobey in the register and don't just put that mobey on your pocket. Are you laughing yet, we were laughing all week at this poor girl who wanted mobey on her pocket.
This isn't the only one we had that was ridiculous this week, one person had some first aid experience and wrote that she had, "training to save live people" and another women whose long run on objective sentence said she wanted to work in an "upcoming and growing work job." So after all of these I have figured out what I am going to do after I leave the retail world, I am going to run classes on how to write resumes and conduct yourself at interviews. After a few more years of this I am pretty sure that I will have seen everything.
But I am not sure how "Mobey on my pocket" will ever be topped.
My First Born
My first born child must go to Stop and Shop in Poughkeepsie New York, and here is why...
One of the fine traditions at the church where my family goes for Easter service is that many families bring flowers to the church. I remembered this while I was in Stop and Shop this afternoon picking up a few items for the family. I have really bad allergies especially to flowers and I forgot my allergy medicine in Boston. Since I was in the supermarket I went up to the pharmacy counter and asked if they carried Claritin, the pharmacist informed me that they did and handed me a clipboard with a form on the top.
I apparently needed to fill out this form and leave a copy of my drivers license in order to buy Claritin. This form had all sorts of questions on it including "Intended use of this product." Hmmmm, well considering it is allergy medicine I think I am going to consume it when I am worried that I am going to sneeze and cough and have watery eyes. But i was tempted to write, "I intend to use these 10 pills to make illegal drugs." Obviously, this is would have been a bad answer, but do they think that the people who are going to use this medicine to make meth are going to honestly answer the question? "Intended use of product- Drug making"
So many questions and 10 minutes to fill out the form, they practically wanted my first born child, all so I wouldn't sneeze in church.
One of the fine traditions at the church where my family goes for Easter service is that many families bring flowers to the church. I remembered this while I was in Stop and Shop this afternoon picking up a few items for the family. I have really bad allergies especially to flowers and I forgot my allergy medicine in Boston. Since I was in the supermarket I went up to the pharmacy counter and asked if they carried Claritin, the pharmacist informed me that they did and handed me a clipboard with a form on the top.
I apparently needed to fill out this form and leave a copy of my drivers license in order to buy Claritin. This form had all sorts of questions on it including "Intended use of this product." Hmmmm, well considering it is allergy medicine I think I am going to consume it when I am worried that I am going to sneeze and cough and have watery eyes. But i was tempted to write, "I intend to use these 10 pills to make illegal drugs." Obviously, this is would have been a bad answer, but do they think that the people who are going to use this medicine to make meth are going to honestly answer the question? "Intended use of product- Drug making"
So many questions and 10 minutes to fill out the form, they practically wanted my first born child, all so I wouldn't sneeze in church.
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