Cone-Heads

Bob is wearing a cone on his head for 14 days to prevent him from getting at his sutures, he is having a really hard time getting around the condo. Most of the time he is secluded in one room but I sometimes lock his sister in the room and let him wander. He tries to get around but bounces into walls and doors, its hard how would you like to have a cone tied around your neck.

I was thinking about this when I decided that this should be my punishment for stupid customers this week, here is how I think this would work...

Can I buy books here, no we just call ourselves a bookstore and you sir can not buy books here now come here while I strap this cone around your neck.

Excuse me I tried to rip this security tag off of this shirt and it got ink all over me and the shirt can I exchange it without a receipt, come here ma'am let me strap this cone around your neck and you can walk around my store for 14 days with it on.

Can you show me what books I need for my class, I don't have a course number or any idea what my professors name is, I am sorry sir I have no idea of knowing what books you need but I can supply you with this lovely cone to strap around your neck.

I can just picture my store full of idiot customers banging into each other because they have cones strapped around the heads and can't navigate, that will teach them to ask stupid questions (and yes there is such a thing as a stupid question). I wonder if I could expand my plan to the real world outside of my store.

Hey idiot who hit me while yapping on his cell phone at the gym, here is your cone.

Coupon lady at the supermarket, here is your cone ma'am.

Ass who cut me off in the ice storm last Wednesday, get out of your car so I can strap this cone around your neck.

Ah yes, this is the best idea I have ever had!